There are two mottos I have borrowed as “my own.”  The first is “Dream out Loud!”  A reference to the idea far too many store their aspirations in a vault somewhere, never letting others know what they want or want to be.  The second is “Make a Difference Everyday!” 

A close friend of mine has achieved incredible success, starting over 40 companies while mentoring hundreds of college students all over America.  He was leading a discussion about his life when someone in the room asked “when did you know you had achieved success.”    My friend answered, “I don’t measure my success by the companies I start or the money that comes in as a result.  I measure my success one day at a time.  If at the end of the day I can honestly say I’ve made a difference in someone’s life, I know I have been successful.”

That remark stuck in the back of my head for many years.  It was something I wanted to aspire to achieve, but not something I really thought I was capable of achieving.  And then, my life changed.  Well not totally, but at least in terms of realizing how even the most seemingly minor situation can be monumental. 

Another friend, Rob, was in town from Texas and wanted to meet.  Rob lived across the hall from me in the dorms when we were freshmen in college.   Over coffee Rob asked me if I remembered the talk we had in the dorms one night during finals week.I was studying near 2 AM and Rob came back from being out all night.  I yelled through the door about what “trouble” he might be causing at such a late hour but he ignored me.  A few minutes later he came out of the room, headed to the shower ,and again I tried to provoke him.  Then, after his shower, the exercise was repeated and again he chose not to respond.  A few minutes later he came out of his room and into mine and sat down.

We talked all night and when daylight arrived, headed for the cafeteria for breakfast.  I don’t recall anything earth-shattering being discussed.  However Rob did.  In fact, now fast-forwarding back to our coffee meeting, he said, “that night changed my life.”  He continued, “That day was horrible for me.  I had gotten my final grade in an architecture class and it wasn’t good.  After a night drowning my sorrows I had decided to end my life.  Our talk helped me realize life was worth living.  I have a great job, a wonderful wife, terrific children, and I owe it all to you.  If you wouldn’t have been there, I probably wouldn’t be here now.”  Needless to say I was floored.  And in retrospect what was more amazing was that I did not do anything profound, I just talked and listened.   I certainly did not realize I was “saving a life.”

As REALTORS@ we change lives every day.  We help our clients find the perfect homes.  We lead some to their first offices or retail stores.  While others count on us to sell their homes to venture off to a new dream.  And in the process we “make a difference” in the lives crossing our paths.  

My challenge for this month is to remind you that while we remember the significance of the interactions with our clients, we sometimes forget the “Robs” of the world we encounter throughout the day, every day.  There are 6 magic words I’ll share.  I hope you’ll burn them in your memory and use them with everyone you meet throughout the month.  Those words are “what can I do to help?” 

(The previous story is an excerpt from the February CCAR Knothole)